I'm sorry

 While I am apologizing to the world for what religion has done to them and made them believe it's Jesus, I refuse to say what they're doing is OK. don't get me wrong, I love these people. But I cannot bear to approve. It just kinda flowed. This is my heart. I want to see hearts healed, lives healed and redeemed. This is what I want to see in my generation and generations past and generations to come.

I'm sorry

So sorry

I judged you according to the laws

I'm sorry

So sorry

That I showed judgement

and not Jesus' love

I'm sorry

So sorry

That I ruined the knowledge 

Of His love for you

I'm sorry
So Sorry
That I mocked
Instead of loved
That I spat on you
Instead of giving you the hug
You needed
Because you planned to kill yourself
That very night


I'm sorry 
So sorry
I should have been there for you
Instead I turned my back


What was I thinking?
That the Christians needed salvation?
Why was I so blind?
Not to see the hurt
The agonizing hurt
That bled from your arms

What was I thinking?
Condemning
When your best friend
Just got killed
Saying that it's God's judgment
Oh, God forgive me
For dashing my ink black
Condemnation
on your head


I fall to my knees
Tears pouring 
Messing up my 
Perfectly made facade
Arms wrapped around me
Lifting me up from my sorrow
Burdens lifted off of me
Freeing me of my sin
My perfect sin

Everything

One of my absolute favorite songs is "Everything" by Lifehouse. People say "oh Jesus is my first priority." As my friend, Mallory, would say, I don't want Jesus to be my first priority. I want Him to be my EVERYTHING. So here we go. Flying by the seat of my pants here:)

I'm giving up everything
So that You can become
My Everything

Curse my pride

That keeps me from You

Curse my arrogance

That makes me think

I am all that

Curse this unbelief 

That threatens to 

Strangle me here

Curse my human thinking

That makes me believe

You can't do it

Curse satan

he who gets inside of my head

And messes with my heart

But most of all

Curse the religion

That makes it all an act

When I should be on my knees

facedown

In awe of your glory

Burn me

Consume me

Mold me into 

A person with Your heart

embedded in my very being. 

Be my everything.

satan can't have my city.

 Hey guys. This is just what I want for my city...gatekeepers to pray, to intercede over my city. I'm doing it. Do it for your city. Stand in the gap for your family, friends, your enemies. Because satan hates it and my sole desire is to give Jesus the glory and to piss satan off. :)

Scarred
Bleeding
Broken and bruised
Crawling
limping
Taking a stand

Standing in the doorway
The gatekeeper watches
Keeping an eye 
Over his city
His region


Fighting
With the invisible
So coldly felt
Fighting 'till the end
Giving up everything
To keep God 
The God of his city


"Never!"
he cries
sending shivers 
down the shadows spines
They scream
covering their ears
"Jesus!"
No, no, no
They cry, writhing in pain


A light begins to shine
It seems from the gatekeeper
A glory from within
Blinding the shadows
As they slowly begin to fade

Standing on the hill
Looking over his city
His light begins to shine
And cover the streets
The homes 
that darkness had covered
Only minutes earlier
It began to spread to every corner
Every place


Limping
Scarred and bleeding
Hands raised to praise
His glory
Face lifted towards the light
Standing in the gap.