Disclaimer: I'm not usually like this. I'm just feeling so much right now. I promise, there won't be a lot of stuff like this (That I share anyway. ;)) Just bear with me. It's not gonna be pretty, just raw emotion.
I like this one guy.
A lot
He makes my heart beat faster
My smile grow wider
My stomach get butterflies
And my cheeks get rosy
His eyes
They dance
His smile
That half smile he gets
His arms wrap around me
So secure
So safe
His kisses
They drip with such sweetness
So tender
His hands
Strong and steady
As they hold mine
Tight in an embrace
I miss you.
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
Friday, October 1, 2010
Mistruths and Freedoms Unknown
I thought I knew truth
Until I was lied to
And kept on falling deeper
I thought I knew freedom
Until I was bound
And kept on being a slave
I thought I broke free
Of these chains and ropes
That surround everything around me
Until velvet steel ropes covered my entire being
Then I met True Love
I met Truth
He ripped into my heart
Pulled all of my blame
and wickedness out
Ravaged my senses with
His all consuming love
He asked me if He could
murder all of my other lovers
These things that keep me bound
What am I to do?
These vices that keep me sane
He wants to be rid of
Rid me of my jealousy
Rid me of my hate
Rid me of my bitterness
My sin
My old name
Give me a new identity
I don't want the old me anymore
Identity in You
You are my everything now
Keep me from temptation
Deliver me from this evil
that pervades
and perverts
Rescue me
My King
Rescue me
At last
I'm Ready.
Until I was lied to
And kept on falling deeper
I thought I knew freedom
Until I was bound
And kept on being a slave
I thought I broke free
Of these chains and ropes
That surround everything around me
Until velvet steel ropes covered my entire being
Then I met True Love
I met Truth
He ripped into my heart
Pulled all of my blame
and wickedness out
Ravaged my senses with
His all consuming love
He asked me if He could
murder all of my other lovers
These things that keep me bound
What am I to do?
These vices that keep me sane
He wants to be rid of
Rid me of my jealousy
Rid me of my hate
Rid me of my bitterness
My sin
My old name
Give me a new identity
I don't want the old me anymore
Identity in You
You are my everything now
Keep me from temptation
Deliver me from this evil
that pervades
and perverts
Rescue me
My King
Rescue me
At last
I'm Ready.
Monday, August 2, 2010
I don't wanna be
I don't wanna be the girl
That every guy likes
That wins everything
And is obsessed with herself
I like to look good
And I like compliments
But I don't wanna be the girl
Who thrives on these things.
I wanna be the girl
Who has one good guy
to stay in her life
To stay by her side
One who can live
without all the adoration
and loves to spend time with Jesus
One who can just laugh
and she's transformed.
I like having fun in life
And I don't need attention
I just want my Jesus
(and that one guy, of course)
to laugh with me
and go on adventures with me
Who's not like all the other guys.
*So it didn't rhyme. Who really cares? :)
That every guy likes
That wins everything
And is obsessed with herself
I like to look good
And I like compliments
But I don't wanna be the girl
Who thrives on these things.
I wanna be the girl
Who has one good guy
to stay in her life
To stay by her side
One who can live
without all the adoration
and loves to spend time with Jesus
One who can just laugh
and she's transformed.
I like having fun in life
And I don't need attention
I just want my Jesus
(and that one guy, of course)
to laugh with me
and go on adventures with me
Who's not like all the other guys.
*So it didn't rhyme. Who really cares? :)
Friday, April 30, 2010
I'm sorry
While I am apologizing to the world for what religion has done to them and made them believe it's Jesus, I refuse to say what they're doing is OK. don't get me wrong, I love these people. But I cannot bear to approve. It just kinda flowed. This is my heart. I want to see hearts healed, lives healed and redeemed. This is what I want to see in my generation and generations past and generations to come.
I'm sorry
So sorry
I judged you according to the laws
I'm sorry
So sorry
That I showed judgement
and not Jesus' love
I'm sorry
So sorry
That I ruined the knowledge
Of His love for youI'm sorry
So Sorry
That I mocked
Instead of loved
That I spat on you
Instead of giving you the hug
You needed
Because you planned to kill yourself
That very night
I'm sorry
So sorry
I should have been there for you
Instead I turned my back
What was I thinking?
That the Christians needed salvation?
Why was I so blind?
Not to see the hurt
The agonizing hurt
That bled from your arms
What was I thinking?
Condemning
When your best friend
Just got killed
Saying that it's God's judgment
Oh, God forgive me
For dashing my ink black
Condemnation
on your head
I fall to my knees
Tears pouring
Messing up my
Perfectly made facade
Arms wrapped around me
Lifting me up from my sorrow
Burdens lifted off of me
Freeing me of my sin
My perfect sin
Everything
One of my absolute favorite songs is "Everything" by Lifehouse. People say "oh Jesus is my first priority." As my friend, Mallory, would say, I don't want Jesus to be my first priority. I want Him to be my EVERYTHING. So here we go. Flying by the seat of my pants here:)
I'm giving up everything
So that You can become
My Everything
I'm giving up everything
So that You can become
My Everything
Curse my pride
That keeps me from You
Curse my arrogance
That makes me think
I am all that
Curse this unbelief
That threatens to
Strangle me here
Curse my human thinking
That makes me believe
You can't do it
Curse satan
he who gets inside of my head
And messes with my heart
But most of all
Curse the religion
That makes it all an act
When I should be on my knees
facedown
In awe of your glory
Burn me
Consume me
Mold me into
A person with Your heart
embedded in my very being.
Be my everything.
satan can't have my city.
Hey guys. This is just what I want for my city...gatekeepers to pray, to intercede over my city. I'm doing it. Do it for your city. Stand in the gap for your family, friends, your enemies. Because satan hates it and my sole desire is to give Jesus the glory and to piss satan off. :)
Scarred
Bleeding
Broken and bruised
Crawling
limping
Taking a stand
Standing in the doorway
The gatekeeper watches
Keeping an eye
Over his city
His region
Fighting
With the invisible
So coldly felt
Fighting 'till the end
Giving up everything
To keep God
The God of his city
"Never!"
he cries
sending shivers
down the shadows spines
They scream
covering their ears
"Jesus!"
No, no, no
They cry, writhing in pain
A light begins to shine
It seems from the gatekeeper
A glory from within
Blinding the shadows
As they slowly begin to fade
Standing on the hill
Looking over his city
His light begins to shine
And cover the streets
The homes
that darkness had covered
Only minutes earlier
It began to spread to every corner
Every place
Limping
Scarred and bleeding
Hands raised to praise
His glory
Face lifted towards the light
Standing in the gap.
Scarred
Bleeding
Broken and bruised
Crawling
limping
Taking a stand
Standing in the doorway
The gatekeeper watches
Keeping an eye
Over his city
His region
Fighting
With the invisible
So coldly felt
Fighting 'till the end
Giving up everything
To keep God
The God of his city
"Never!"
he cries
sending shivers
down the shadows spines
They scream
covering their ears
"Jesus!"
No, no, no
They cry, writhing in pain
A light begins to shine
It seems from the gatekeeper
A glory from within
Blinding the shadows
As they slowly begin to fade
Standing on the hill
Looking over his city
His light begins to shine
And cover the streets
The homes
that darkness had covered
Only minutes earlier
It began to spread to every corner
Every place
Limping
Scarred and bleeding
Hands raised to praise
His glory
Face lifted towards the light
Standing in the gap.
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
Silence
What is this, this silence that smothers
That kills?
Misunderstood
People taking my side
And blurring things
Unrecognizable
I'm misunderstood by you
I never wanted to be bitter against you
And still
I'm not
Yet the things that people say
That they write
Make me seem like a monster
I want your life to be good
And I want you to be happy
I just wish there wasn't this silence
I don't want a relationship
I just want friendship
How are you doing?
Are you sticking to your faith?
Are you being swayed by this world?
Stay strong, my friend
Stand strong in Christ
I feel like I cannot talk to you
Because of this silence
Curse this silence
This silence that kills.
That kills?
Misunderstood
People taking my side
And blurring things
Unrecognizable
I'm misunderstood by you
I never wanted to be bitter against you
And still
I'm not
Yet the things that people say
That they write
Make me seem like a monster
I want your life to be good
And I want you to be happy
I just wish there wasn't this silence
I don't want a relationship
I just want friendship
How are you doing?
Are you sticking to your faith?
Are you being swayed by this world?
Stay strong, my friend
Stand strong in Christ
I feel like I cannot talk to you
Because of this silence
Curse this silence
This silence that kills.
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